good times

So this term has been pretty great so far. I know it's only Wednesday but I'm really feeling much better about everything. I think one of the main reasons is that I implemented seating charts right away. I used to only use seating charts when I felt I needed to, as a last resort in a way, but this time I decided to just start right away. It seems to set the tone immediately that I'm in control - plus it keeps them away from their friends a bit. :)

I've also FINALLY started doing singing, solfege and sight-reading with my 5th graders and I looooove it. I love how the kids are responding and how they're so eager to demonstrate exercises and sing. I used to do so much talking and now I'm starting to realize how much kids want to participate and talk and show off and be a part of the lesson, especially younger ones. I love hearing them sing!

We were also treated to a concert by the York Consort. The kids were really fascinated by the instruments and asked so many questions. (Actually they were mostly fascinated by the sheep gut strings, haha). The concert was so informative and enjoyable. It was awesome! Thanks, Nancy!

fighting the couch potato urge...

I am soooo lazy today. This probably has something to do with the fact that I spent all day yesterday at a great wedding! I was honored to be asked to cantor at the ceremony, and then of course we all partied a lot at the reception! So that combined with the gray skies outside makes me want to sit around for the rest of the night in pajamas and do nothing productive.

But of course I can't! Why, you ask? Tomorrow starts the second arts rotation, which means I will be seeing brand new groups in my general music classes. I have to start alllll over again! This schedule is great in lots of ways. The kids have music every day for eight weeks, then switch to another arts class. If I decide I want to change or modify any of my projects or units, I don't have to wait until the next school year to do so. I get four chances to try things in different ways - so that's great. The hard part is, well, I have to start from scratch four times. So I know I have to sit down with my plan book and lesson plans and reflect upon the term and what I want to do differently or make sure I do the same.  Of course if I want to make any big changes, it's Sunday at 5:30...so probably nothing drastic will be happening.

I made it one of my goals this year to keep daily lesson plans for all of my classes - like full, hand-written lesson plans with objectives and staging and all of that good stuff. I've done a decent job, but pretty much forgot about it for the last couple of weeks. It seems that it's hard to map out a unit in days (such as "Unit 1: Day 3: students will blah blah blah...") because it seems to change with every term. Different kids, different schedules, etc. But as long as I can keep the general structure, pacing and timing of a unit on record, I think it will help me a lot.

I'm quite a planner. I am not good at "winging it". Even when it's something like making a speech to my students, I always practice what I'm going to say. I just don't work well when I'm under that kind of pressure. It's like I can't think straight about what I'm trying to accomplish because I'm usually distracted by something. So it's always best for me to know ahead of time what I'm going to say or do. This can get kind of annoying though, because there are often times when I have to think on my feet. Those lessons or discussions or activities never feel like they go as well. Hopefully this is something I can work on.

I also want to say how much I loved my 5th grade group this time around. They were the sweetest kids ever and were genuinely sad to leave to go to their next arts class. I had them fill out a brief course evaluation and one thing I asked was for their favorite and least favorite unit. Most, if not all, said they didn't have a least favorite and liked everything! So that was great. I think it has made a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE difference this year  being an advisor.

It totally changes the way kids see me as compared to last year's 5th graders. There has just been much less behavior issues than ever before. I know it's only November, but I am just so pleased with how well the 5th grade has been going this year. Even in Chorus, where I would typically count on the 6th graders to lead the way, the 5th grade has been much better behaved and more responsive overall.

I better go knock on some wood like right now.

Ok, I did.

Thanks for all of the comments last time by the way! Keep them coming!

Those 5th Graders!

This morning I attended a festival for classroom music teachers in my county.  It was my first time going to this particular festival, mostly because I haven't taught younger grades before. I'll be honest and say that I'm never all that excited to go to these things. HOWEVER, I always leave with new ideas, and that's all that really matters. Getting new ideas and staying fresh with teaching is so important. I feel like I can never have enough new lessons, games, resources, etc.

It's always inspiring watching teachers who just make it look so easy. I get way too focused on myself when I teach - what am I doing, what do I look like, what could I  do better? Not that these are bad things, but I feel like it takes away from the kids! I put so much pressure on myself and am constantly analyzing myself that I might be thinking about myself more than the kids in front of me.  I think I just need to have more FUN and also not be afraid to try certain things. I've shied away from singing with my 5th graders, but the more I think about it, the more I realize that it needs to happen. Even though I only see them for a short time, if I want to improve on the kid's reading skills, that's the best way I know how. It's also something I (obviously) feel comfortable doing myself. What I want to do is make sure I present it to the kids in the right way - that singing is just what we do in my class. I think the best way to start this next term is to incorporate it into warm-up activities, which I was already going to do.

I'd really like to see what others do with their 5th graders. My particular situation is different from most of my teacher friends in that I see the kids every day for 8 weeks and then I don't see them until next year. Many people have the kids from kindergarten through 5th - sometimes through 4th. Regardless, I'd like to spend some more time learning what other people are doing with their 5th graders. How much will 5th graders be willing to do as far as singing, dancing, etc.? What about instruments?  I know it always depends on the group, but I'd still love to know more from my colleagues (which is generally the idea behind this blog). :)

As always, please comment! If you have trouble, you can always just comment anonymously. I also know those "prove you're not a robot" detector thingies can be really annoying. :)

Assessment

I need to get better about assessing my students on a regular basis. We had a faculty meeting recently and many of the teachers had so many insightful things to say about grades, assessments, rubrics, expectations, and as per usual it made me feel inadequate as a teacher! I'm not great when it comes to giving feedback and grades - which is not good! So I want to go into next term with as many rubrics and assessments ready as possible (which is the week after next - yikes!) I think it will help me keep track of student progress as well as keep students accountable and understand what is expected of them. I need to this for all of my classes.

On another note, I hate Tuesdays. I teach three 84 minute blocks plus two short Chorus rehearsals plus another 42 minute class. Especially on a rainy day...yuck. Exhausting.

On yet another note, I really need to work on making my choral rehearsals more fun. There are many excuses I could make about what's wrong with the schedule and behavior but really when it comes down to it, I need to make things more fun and also more meaningful. My kids are just not reading music at all and spending too much time talking. I wish they walked in the door with the incentive to want to sing better and put all of their personal things aside, but they don't. If I don't keep their attention non-stop, it's all over. I just want to have things ready to keep their attention and make them want to stop talking to their friend and pay attention. I know it will take time, but blech...I just want it to be better now!

A typical Friday night...

Here I am on a rockin' Saturday night, wearing my favorite penguin fleece pajama pants and new favorite hoodie from school. I could not be any cooler.

I've noticed an unfortunate trend in my life that's probably been going on for years.  It seems that every week, I start out feeling relaxed, hopeful and even refreshed to conquer a new week of teaching...

...yet by Friday, I'm generally exhausted, cranky and spend most of the evening thinking about how all of my lessons went that week and everything that didn't go well and all of my weaknesses as a teacher. Like to the point where I really question if I'm doing the right thing with my life and whether or not I should find a new job and let someone else take over who would do better.

Not too fun.

I would love to have a week where I feel the majority of things went well. Perhaps after many years of teaching, this may happen. Who knows? I wonder if anyone else feels this way.

I think my main problem is that I lack confidence, particularly when it comes to dealing with conflict. For instance, it takes a LOT for me to approach a kid in the hall and ask them why they didn't come to rehearsal that day. It takes a LOT for me to sit and have a serious talk with a student about a problem. It's like, I often am aware of what or who is causing the problem, but I am not always sure how to fix it nor am I willing to step out of my comfort zone to make whatever changes are necessary.

I HAVE gotten better about calling parents...so that's good. I used to be absolutely terrified to call parents, but it's getting easier, probably because I've done it a few times now.

I guess that's always what it comes down to...just forcing myself to do something and it'll eventually get easier. At least I hope that's the way.

I also wish I was a better "salesman". I mean so much of teaching is getting the kids to buy into what you're selling/teaching.  I wish I knew how to get kids to take ownership and be more self-motivated, particularly in Chorus.  I wish they were more interested in singing their parts and learning about their voices than talking to their friend next to them. I've always hoped that kids will eventually catch on and how realize how cool singing and music are, but it seems at the middle school level there has to be more fear involved.

Again, I think that over time I will figure these things out, but it's SOOOOOOOOOOO frustrating to not be there yet. I think about my students and feel guilty that they're not getting to work with a seasoned teacher. I feel like they could get so much more out of their classes if they had a teacher who was more experienced, more strict and more confident.

Blech.

And tomorrow I have to go to school anyway, so I'm planning on getting all kinds of things done. I need like 17 more hours in the day, and then I might actually feel completely prepared for the day. But probably not...

p.s. I promise I'll blog about positive things once in awhile.  I just don't feel the need to sit and write about things when I'm feeling good.

"Who needs sleep?"....ME! (and so do you!)

On Wednesday, after I created that very unhappy post, I got to take part in one of the best professional days ever! The best part was that at 10:30, we were able to take a yoga class with one of the dance teacher at my school! It was excellent (and I was able to check one thing off my "30 before 30" list!).

I totally did that pose.

Ok no I didn't.

(I am the most inflexible person ever. I'm amazed that anyone can sit and reach their toes. Seriously.)

I really loved it - it was relaxing, challenging, rewarding and most importantly, stress relieving! I've since then looked up the schedule of yoga classes at my gym and am planning on trying to make that a part of my week on a regular basis. I think that it will be great for so many reasons.

I've also just kinda chilled out the last couple of nights, which is great. I've loaded up the first couple days of the week. On Monday, I teach all of my private lessons (4 voice students) and on Tuesday I have choir rehearsal for 2+ hours. So Wednesdays have become my evening of doing whatever I want. Tonight I actually fell asleep and woke up too late to go to my church choir rehearsal :-/ but I know I needed the extra nap.

It took me a few years to realize just how bad it is to not get enough sleep. It was at the point where I was teaching and would lose my voice almost completely by Thursday because I was going to some kind of rehearsal almost every single night of the week while also waking up at 6 am. I would probably get an average of 6 hours of sleep a night, which is just NOT enough for me. Besides losing my voice, being tired also makes me cranky and irrational. It makes something that normally wouldn't be a big deal seem like the end of the world.

I would love to go back in time and tell myself this. I think back to the days in college when I would be awake until well past midnight having deep conversations and making all these emotional decisions. How ridiculous! Now whenever I'm on Facebook and I see my former students posting sad or depressing messages at 3 am, I just want to shake them and say GO TO SLEEP! I guarantee whatever is on your mind can wait until tomorrow, and it will DEFINITELY be a lot easier to deal with after you get some sleeeeeeep!

So it's all about balance. I love feeling rested and relaxed, but now I have to start working in some exercise. I think yoga will be a nice way back in, because it is something physical and challenging. Plus I'll be at the gym already, so maybe I'll make the effort to walk 20 feet and hop on a treadmill!

...maybe...

Tired...

So here we are in the 3rd week of school. We have a professional day and I probably should be using this time to work on my classes or administrative stuff. But I've been itching to write for awhile, as there's lots of things on my mind since the start of this year.

I knew it would be a big transition going from part-time to full-time. So many people congratulated me when they heard the news and while I was happy about some aspects, I kept going back to thinking about how I would miss sleeping in and being able to leave in the afternoon if I was finished teaching. Those kinds of things made such a difference in my overall level of energy and happiness. And sure enough, I come home every day feeling exhausted and overwhelmed, and I wake up every morning wishing I could sleep more.

Being part-time is just so much healthier for your body, even if it's not as healthy for your bank account.

Of course I'm writing this as I'm tired, which means it will be much crankier and bitter than it would be if I was writing this on a Saturday morning at 10 am.

It just frustrates me that I'm so wiped out after a day of teaching. I mean I know it's great that I'm dedicated to my job and that I care about what I do, but I would certainly like to have more energy at the end of the day. I haven't exercised in weeks, because when I have any amount of time to myself, I seem to fill it up with either doing more schoolwork or sitting down. I used to love exercising and I felt like I needed to do it every day to feel good about myself. Now it's completely at the bottom of my list of priorities. And while I try to convince myself I'm okay with it, I'm clearly not, since I get extremely jealous and sad when I hear about someone else I know getting up early to exercise or going for a run or signing up for a race. It makes me feel like I should be doing the same thing but I can't seem to make myself to do it anymore.

I know part of it is that I'm new at this job, and therefore going a little crazy figuring out how and what I want to teach. And it's not like once I do it for the first time, I've got it down. It takes constant tweaking and revising and analyzing. And I never feel like I'm prepared enough. I can spend a lot of time getting ready for one class, but oh wait, there's three more I haven't thought about for that day!

So I guess I'm just venting. I'm sure every full-time teacher feels this way at some point. I just need to figure out what's important to me, and clearly, sleeping and exercise should get much higher ranking on my priority list! I can't wait until some time has passed and I feel more comfortable with my classes. (So, like, 25 years from now...)