I apologize in advance if I seem whiny or attention-seeking...I really don't mean to. (Of course you also don't have to read this if you don't want to!) Some of these thoughts have been going through my mind lately as it's been All-County time and I'm spending time with other music teachers and, as always, comparing myself to others.
I seem to be struggling a lot lately with confidence in my abilities as an educator and voice teacher. Since it's been All-County time for the past few weeks, and it has made me contemplate the idea of ever conducting at a festival like that, and how I would be simply terrified. And that makes me sad, because I'm sure at some point I used to think I would love to do something like that! And it's not just that. I just really miss looking forward to choral rehearsals. I miss doing fun exercises and games with the kids. God I hope it gets better with time.
I just get so down on myself about teaching, to the point where I wonder if it's worth it. Even when I teach privately, I'm worried that I'm missing something big that the kid is doing wrong, or that I'm not covering the basics well enough. I am such a WORRIER. And maybe it's better to be a teacher who is concerned instead of a teacher who really doesn't care, but what if the concern is holding me back?
The thing is I know that I'm a good musician and a good singer and a good person, and all three of those things should make for a darn good teacher...but I just don't think I'm there...and I want to be! What can I do to become more confident? Is it getting more experience? Watching others and getting some new ideas? Even if I do get all those things, will I ever really feel like I'm doing a good job, or will I always worry and second guess myself? I would love to sit in a meeting with other teachers and feel confident enough to count myself as an equal...but I'm definitely not there yet.
Seems like a good first step would be to remind myself what my strengths are, and try to go from there...
Monday, March 25, 2013
Tuesday, March 12, 2013
Chorus woes
So, I love singing, as clearly indicated by the name of this blog. In fact when I went to college I didn't even really know what I wanted to do. I just knew I loved music and I loved to sing. More specifically, I love singing in a choir. I don't even understand people who don't love it as much as I do. It's basically the greatest thing you can do with your time, and I would feel like the greatest person in the world if I could get my kids to feel the same way.
But sadly I have found that in my current position, I don't like, ok, I despise the choral program. I rarely look forward to teaching either of my two choirs (5/6 and 7/8). This is partially due to the schedule and mainly due to my lack of ability to teach this age group.
The deal is I don't get to see my choirs very often. So all of the things that I LOVE doing - fun warm-ups, sight-reading, activities to help us read the music - I feel like I have no time to do any of it because it's just soooo important to get ready for the concert. I find myself just pushing them through to learn the notes and memorize the songs in the little time that we have. And as a result, my rehearsals are lame and unfulfilling and the kids are not learning a darn thing about reading music or vocal technique - two things that are essential to being in a choir!!!!!!!
It's to the point where I'll be sitting in one of my own choral rehearsals and find myself thinking about my students and how they are not getting nearly as much out of Choir as they could be and that I'm depriving these kids of a great experience. (I know it sounds dramatic but that's really how I feel!)
The thing that's hardest for me is the younger kids. I forget sometimes that for most of them, this is the first time they've been in a Chorus. They don't know what it's like to be a good Chorus student - what frame of reference do they have? I am the one who should be teaching them these basic fundamental things, but I find myself NOT doing that! It's like I just expect them to know what to do and when they don't, I just get frustrated and negative. I wish I could find the balance between making my rehearsals fun while still creating a true learning environment.
I know the best answer for me is to stop making excuses and to teach the way I want to. Sure, I don't see them a lot, but that doesn't mean I can't come up with routines to get us warmed up and make them think about their voices. It doesn't mean I can't spend 2 minutes doing a sight-reading exercise or choose one less song to do in the concert. I know that in the long run, it is way better to take the time to teach them how to read music and how to sing correctly.
I'm also in a school where I have a lot of freedom to do what I like with the choral program. So theoretically I could audition all my singers and only take the ones who I know will take it seriously - even in 5th grade. But is that right? Should I give all the young kids a chance, or raise the credibility of the program by adding a screening process? Will this discourage good kids from joining if they're afraid to audition, or will it "weed out" the kids that I get frustrated with?
I'd love to hear your thoughts, as usual.
Almost spring break!
But sadly I have found that in my current position, I don't like, ok, I despise the choral program. I rarely look forward to teaching either of my two choirs (5/6 and 7/8). This is partially due to the schedule and mainly due to my lack of ability to teach this age group.
The deal is I don't get to see my choirs very often. So all of the things that I LOVE doing - fun warm-ups, sight-reading, activities to help us read the music - I feel like I have no time to do any of it because it's just soooo important to get ready for the concert. I find myself just pushing them through to learn the notes and memorize the songs in the little time that we have. And as a result, my rehearsals are lame and unfulfilling and the kids are not learning a darn thing about reading music or vocal technique - two things that are essential to being in a choir!!!!!!!
It's to the point where I'll be sitting in one of my own choral rehearsals and find myself thinking about my students and how they are not getting nearly as much out of Choir as they could be and that I'm depriving these kids of a great experience. (I know it sounds dramatic but that's really how I feel!)
The thing that's hardest for me is the younger kids. I forget sometimes that for most of them, this is the first time they've been in a Chorus. They don't know what it's like to be a good Chorus student - what frame of reference do they have? I am the one who should be teaching them these basic fundamental things, but I find myself NOT doing that! It's like I just expect them to know what to do and when they don't, I just get frustrated and negative. I wish I could find the balance between making my rehearsals fun while still creating a true learning environment.
I know the best answer for me is to stop making excuses and to teach the way I want to. Sure, I don't see them a lot, but that doesn't mean I can't come up with routines to get us warmed up and make them think about their voices. It doesn't mean I can't spend 2 minutes doing a sight-reading exercise or choose one less song to do in the concert. I know that in the long run, it is way better to take the time to teach them how to read music and how to sing correctly.
I'm also in a school where I have a lot of freedom to do what I like with the choral program. So theoretically I could audition all my singers and only take the ones who I know will take it seriously - even in 5th grade. But is that right? Should I give all the young kids a chance, or raise the credibility of the program by adding a screening process? Will this discourage good kids from joining if they're afraid to audition, or will it "weed out" the kids that I get frustrated with?
I'd love to hear your thoughts, as usual.
Almost spring break!
Thursday, January 31, 2013
"DJ!"
Ooooops, it has been a really long time since I posted! Well, this is definitely worth a post. Today while searching on Google for the option to disable the infamous "DJ" button on the keyboards in my classroom, I found some hilarious comments on some random message board. I laughed so hard I cried because they are totally true and make me wonder if some of my students wrote them...
(If you don't have these delightful keyboards in your classroom, you will not find this nearly as funny as I did. You should also consider yourself lucky.)
It's certainly wonderful to have a set of classroom keyboards, but the second they discover that DJ button...it's all over...
Anyway, enjoy.
From the website: http://www.lawoftheplayground.com/browse.php?type=subject&id=1063
"The "DJ" button on some Yamaha keyboards has to be the greatest ever button ever made ever, anywhere, on anything.
Pressing it unleashes a loud shout of "DJ!", which for some strange reason seems to infuriate music teachers. It also changes all the keys to various "DJ" sounds, including several orgasmic moans.
When our music teacher told Alan to press the DJ button until he got bored of it, I think Alan believed he had died and gone to heaven."
"The DJ button is indeed the finest thing ever put on a keyboard. Our Music lessons were a doss at the best of times, but the day we discovered the uses of the DJ button was like finding the Holy Grail.
This culminated in a couple of lads using the moaning sounds to recreate a porn soundtrack. All it really needed was the kid next to them playing a bit of 70s funk guitar, and if you shut your eyes, it'd have been perfect."
"The DJ button also infuriated our teacher. When asked to go away and write a composition, those with the new Yamaha keyboards would invariably come back with a mishmash of orgasmic moans, "DJ!" and "Dictionary" (another function). We were eventually banned from using that key."
(If you don't have these delightful keyboards in your classroom, you will not find this nearly as funny as I did. You should also consider yourself lucky.)
It's certainly wonderful to have a set of classroom keyboards, but the second they discover that DJ button...it's all over...
Anyway, enjoy.
From the website: http://www.lawoftheplayground.com/browse.php?type=subject&id=1063
"The "DJ" button on some Yamaha keyboards has to be the greatest ever button ever made ever, anywhere, on anything.
Pressing it unleashes a loud shout of "DJ!", which for some strange reason seems to infuriate music teachers. It also changes all the keys to various "DJ" sounds, including several orgasmic moans.
When our music teacher told Alan to press the DJ button until he got bored of it, I think Alan believed he had died and gone to heaven."
"The DJ button is indeed the finest thing ever put on a keyboard. Our Music lessons were a doss at the best of times, but the day we discovered the uses of the DJ button was like finding the Holy Grail.
This culminated in a couple of lads using the moaning sounds to recreate a porn soundtrack. All it really needed was the kid next to them playing a bit of 70s funk guitar, and if you shut your eyes, it'd have been perfect."
"The DJ button also infuriated our teacher. When asked to go away and write a composition, those with the new Yamaha keyboards would invariably come back with a mishmash of orgasmic moans, "DJ!" and "Dictionary" (another function). We were eventually banned from using that key."
Monday, November 26, 2012
Sign language for me - pay no attention! :)
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/SEASON/5329/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/OF/6086/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/WONDER/8129/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/LIGHT/5590/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/STAR/2619/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/SHINE/4487/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/BRIGHT/3072/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/AGAINST/865/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/COLD/533/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/DARK/1190/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/NIGHT/22/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/POUR/2173/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/YOUR/501/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/DOWN/1239/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/LOVE/255/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/FROM/159/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/GREAT/3557/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/SKY/2523/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/OF/6086/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/WONDER/8129/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/LIGHT/5590/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/STAR/2619/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/SHINE/4487/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/BRIGHT/3072/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/AGAINST/865/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/COLD/533/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/DARK/1190/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/NIGHT/22/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/POUR/2173/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/YOUR/501/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/DOWN/1239/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/LOVE/255/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/FROM/159/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/GREAT/3557/1
http://www.signingsavvy.com/sign/SKY/2523/1
Sunday, November 25, 2012
STRESS! (a major theme of my life)
As the busiest time of year looms ahead, I'm bracing myself...I have to keep remembering to stay as relaxed as possible and to de-stress whenever I can! I bought some new sneaks, which is usually great motivation to get back out there. I used to run regularly, but haven't for the last year or so, mainly because my knees starting acting up and also because I think it can actually ADD stress to my life. However, I think it's time to start it up again, just not so intense.
(they look sort of like this...)
My main purpose of this post, however, is to get some feedback from my devoted fans... (whoever you may be...)
How stressful do you find teaching? What is "normal" stress and what are the signs that you might be happier or better suited somewhere else?
I'm not necessarily speaking about me, although there have been MANY times when I've contemplated changing jobs or switching careers. (Not that I would probably have that luxury at this time...) I'm just wondering how normal that is?
Also...what are your tricks for staying fresh and not getting burned out? I've found the following things are great distractions and hopefully relieve some stress:
- Exercise (but not too crazy!)
- Shopping (I'm contemplating starting a separate blog dedicated to my love of Vera Bradley...)
- Baking
- Yoga (ok I only did it once but I need to do it more!)
- Blogging!
...but I would love more outlets for stress relief, because it's something I will always be dealing with.
Thanks!
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
good times
So this term has been pretty great so far. I know it's only Wednesday but I'm really feeling much better about everything. I think one of the main reasons is that I implemented seating charts right away. I used to only use seating charts when I felt I needed to, as a last resort in a way, but this time I decided to just start right away. It seems to set the tone immediately that I'm in control - plus it keeps them away from their friends a bit. :)
I've also FINALLY started doing singing, solfege and sight-reading with my 5th graders and I looooove it. I love how the kids are responding and how they're so eager to demonstrate exercises and sing. I used to do so much talking and now I'm starting to realize how much kids want to participate and talk and show off and be a part of the lesson, especially younger ones. I love hearing them sing!
We were also treated to a concert by the York Consort. The kids were really fascinated by the instruments and asked so many questions. (Actually they were mostly fascinated by the sheep gut strings, haha). The concert was so informative and enjoyable. It was awesome! Thanks, Nancy!
I've also FINALLY started doing singing, solfege and sight-reading with my 5th graders and I looooove it. I love how the kids are responding and how they're so eager to demonstrate exercises and sing. I used to do so much talking and now I'm starting to realize how much kids want to participate and talk and show off and be a part of the lesson, especially younger ones. I love hearing them sing!
We were also treated to a concert by the York Consort. The kids were really fascinated by the instruments and asked so many questions. (Actually they were mostly fascinated by the sheep gut strings, haha). The concert was so informative and enjoyable. It was awesome! Thanks, Nancy!
Sunday, November 4, 2012
fighting the couch potato urge...
I am soooo lazy today. This probably has something to do with the fact that I spent all day yesterday at a great wedding! I was honored to be asked to cantor at the ceremony, and then of course we all partied a lot at the reception! So that combined with the gray skies outside makes me want to sit around for the rest of the night in pajamas and do nothing productive.
But of course I can't! Why, you ask? Tomorrow starts the second arts rotation, which means I will be seeing brand new groups in my general music classes. I have to start alllll over again! This schedule is great in lots of ways. The kids have music every day for eight weeks, then switch to another arts class. If I decide I want to change or modify any of my projects or units, I don't have to wait until the next school year to do so. I get four chances to try things in different ways - so that's great. The hard part is, well, I have to start from scratch four times. So I know I have to sit down with my plan book and lesson plans and reflect upon the term and what I want to do differently or make sure I do the same. Of course if I want to make any big changes, it's Sunday at 5:30...so probably nothing drastic will be happening.
I made it one of my goals this year to keep daily lesson plans for all of my classes - like full, hand-written lesson plans with objectives and staging and all of that good stuff. I've done a decent job, but pretty much forgot about it for the last couple of weeks. It seems that it's hard to map out a unit in days (such as "Unit 1: Day 3: students will blah blah blah...") because it seems to change with every term. Different kids, different schedules, etc. But as long as I can keep the general structure, pacing and timing of a unit on record, I think it will help me a lot.
I'm quite a planner. I am not good at "winging it". Even when it's something like making a speech to my students, I always practice what I'm going to say. I just don't work well when I'm under that kind of pressure. It's like I can't think straight about what I'm trying to accomplish because I'm usually distracted by something. So it's always best for me to know ahead of time what I'm going to say or do. This can get kind of annoying though, because there are often times when I have to think on my feet. Those lessons or discussions or activities never feel like they go as well. Hopefully this is something I can work on.
I also want to say how much I loved my 5th grade group this time around. They were the sweetest kids ever and were genuinely sad to leave to go to their next arts class. I had them fill out a brief course evaluation and one thing I asked was for their favorite and least favorite unit. Most, if not all, said they didn't have a least favorite and liked everything! So that was great. I think it has made a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE difference this year being an advisor.
It totally changes the way kids see me as compared to last year's 5th graders. There has just been much less behavior issues than ever before. I know it's only November, but I am just so pleased with how well the 5th grade has been going this year. Even in Chorus, where I would typically count on the 6th graders to lead the way, the 5th grade has been much better behaved and more responsive overall.
I better go knock on some wood like right now.
Ok, I did.
Thanks for all of the comments last time by the way! Keep them coming!
But of course I can't! Why, you ask? Tomorrow starts the second arts rotation, which means I will be seeing brand new groups in my general music classes. I have to start alllll over again! This schedule is great in lots of ways. The kids have music every day for eight weeks, then switch to another arts class. If I decide I want to change or modify any of my projects or units, I don't have to wait until the next school year to do so. I get four chances to try things in different ways - so that's great. The hard part is, well, I have to start from scratch four times. So I know I have to sit down with my plan book and lesson plans and reflect upon the term and what I want to do differently or make sure I do the same. Of course if I want to make any big changes, it's Sunday at 5:30...so probably nothing drastic will be happening.
I made it one of my goals this year to keep daily lesson plans for all of my classes - like full, hand-written lesson plans with objectives and staging and all of that good stuff. I've done a decent job, but pretty much forgot about it for the last couple of weeks. It seems that it's hard to map out a unit in days (such as "Unit 1: Day 3: students will blah blah blah...") because it seems to change with every term. Different kids, different schedules, etc. But as long as I can keep the general structure, pacing and timing of a unit on record, I think it will help me a lot.
I'm quite a planner. I am not good at "winging it". Even when it's something like making a speech to my students, I always practice what I'm going to say. I just don't work well when I'm under that kind of pressure. It's like I can't think straight about what I'm trying to accomplish because I'm usually distracted by something. So it's always best for me to know ahead of time what I'm going to say or do. This can get kind of annoying though, because there are often times when I have to think on my feet. Those lessons or discussions or activities never feel like they go as well. Hopefully this is something I can work on.
I also want to say how much I loved my 5th grade group this time around. They were the sweetest kids ever and were genuinely sad to leave to go to their next arts class. I had them fill out a brief course evaluation and one thing I asked was for their favorite and least favorite unit. Most, if not all, said they didn't have a least favorite and liked everything! So that was great. I think it has made a HUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE difference this year being an advisor.
It totally changes the way kids see me as compared to last year's 5th graders. There has just been much less behavior issues than ever before. I know it's only November, but I am just so pleased with how well the 5th grade has been going this year. Even in Chorus, where I would typically count on the 6th graders to lead the way, the 5th grade has been much better behaved and more responsive overall.
I better go knock on some wood like right now.
Ok, I did.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)